Bittersweet

Bittersweet. That's how it felt yesterday to graduate from Eastern Connecticut State University. It was so exciting to graduate and be done and move on in life, but at the same time it was sad. Eastern has been my home for the last four years. Ups and downs and lefts and rights. No matter what the place thew at me I was okay with it in the end, because it all helped shaped the person I have become today. The girl that walked out of the XL Center with her diploma wasn't the same girl that walked into Eastern freshman year. This new girl is so much older and wiser. She has experienced things in life that were both good and bad. She gained and lost friends and discovered who her "true" friends are. I look back and even though there are so many things that I wish had never happened, I don't think I would change a thing. Everything that happened, happened for a reason and I am super thankful for all of that.

It was crazy running around and snapping pictures with all my friends. I am going to miss them all so much. I look back and think of all the memories that we have all shared and all the years were have been together. Now we will have to physically get up the effort and go drive to each others houses to visit instead of rolling out of bed and walking across campus. It will be harder to see everyone, but we won't lose touch. There is facebook and AIM and skype and cell phones. We are all just a click away from each other pretty much. Still it won't be the same. I don't think any of it will sink in until late August. When Ali move's in and I don't, I will probably find that sadness and realization that this is all real. I have graduated from college. I am no longer a kid.

After the ceremony and while we are all milling around with friends and families and snapping a hundred thousand pictures, I got a text message. I figured it was Jeanette, Reeni, or Shrutika, but it was none of them. I look down and stare at my phone, read the name, blink, and stare some more. The name staring back up at me was one I have wanted to see, but at the same time did not. Mike BBKF. That was the name on my phone. Mike had sent me a message. Why? For what? We haven't talked in like 2 months and all of a sudden he was sending me a message. I opened it up, afraid of what I might find. "Congratulations on graduating." That's all it said. It took me a little bit to respond but i sent back a simple, "thank you." That's all and we didn't say anything else. I am glad. If he had continued talking to me I might have flipped out and then would have ruined the rest of my day. So that was that. I don't know what weill happen as the summer goes on, but I am trying to put it behind me and move on with my life and concentrate on better things.

Like Kyle. The two of us are getting together on Thursday! I am very excited for all of this and can't wait to see him. We talk every day and it's usually late because he works and I always fall asleep on him, but he doesn't seem to mind. Any time he gets to talk to me is good for him. And in talking to Jocelyn today I found something else about Kyle. No lie. This kid is my other half. The he also has the habit of getting into a relationship and pushing people away. He doesn't want to seem clingy and such and likes to be independent. He's also insecure himself. It's seriously me in male form! We are so perfect for each other. We really are. I hope something comes out with all of this because I can see myself with him and really want to be with him. I'm nervous as well since I haven't too much experience in this department but I am going to try my hardest to make it work,

~Dragon Eyes~

Me and Dee

Me, Mike and Kerri

Me and Alex

Me and Reeni

Me and Jeanette

Kristen, Dee and Me

Me and my roomies